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Memorials: Redwood Forest Friends Meeting

Rosemary Hayes

Date of birth

May 3, 1923

Date of death

Aug. 19, 2023

Meeting

Redwood Forest Friends Meeting

Memorial minute

Rosemary Hadden Hayes, born May 3, 1923, in San Diego, California, was the eldest of Robert Jones Hadden and Ruth Clifford Hadden’s five children. She grew up in Pasadena, attended Wellesley College and graduated Phi Beta Kappa from UC Berkeley in 1943 with a BA in Political Science. After working for government agencies during World War II and Matson Lines thereafter, she married Henry Reed Hayes, Jr. Initially living in San Francisco, they moved east to Connecticut in 1953, returning to the Bay Area in 1964. They reared two daughters, Yvonne Hayes of Albuquerque, NM, and Ruth Hayes of Olympia, WA.

Rosemary’s most powerful early memories included summers swimming in the Pacific and a trip to Germany in 1937 that opened her eyes to issues of social justice. She expressed her lifelong love for nature – the ocean in particular – and a deep concern for human rights by supporting environmental causes and organizations such as Amnesty International and by advocating for world peace, including standing in Santa Rosa with Women in Black.

Brought up in an “earnestly education-focused Presbyterian family,” Rosemary devoted much of her adulthood to the search for a “sacred center” and to helping cultivate that search in others. In the early 1970s, she began volunteering as a storyteller in the 4th and 5th grades, relating myths and folk tales to encourage children to appreciate their own imagination and sense of self. She used this experience as the basis for an MA in Education for Human Values from the San Francisco Theological Seminary in 1984. In 1971, she discovered the Guild for Psychological Studies in Middletown, CA, connecting her storytelling with her own spiritual search.

Rosemary and Henry moved to Friends House in Santa Rosa in 2006, where she earned recognition as “our own master storyteller and hopeful spirit.” There she was introduced to Quaker ethics and values, and just three years ago joined Redwood Forest Friends Meeting. Rosemary was predeceased by her husband Henry (2009), her parents, and siblings Robert, Jane (Schimpff), Winifred (Lennihan) and Frederic. She is survived by her daughters, numerous Hayes and Hadden nieces & nephews, godchildren, and dear friends. In lieu of flowers, the family requests contributions be made in Rosemary’s name to Planned Parenthood.